Purity – That Invisible Line in the Sand
Recently, I led a purity class for 6th grade girls and their mothers.
We used the Passport-2-Purity curriculum by Dennis and Barbara Rainey. Over a six-week period, we discussed peer pressure, parental expectations, and (of course) the birds and the bees. The course ended with the daughters signing a “Wait-to-Date Contract” stating they would follow the guidance of their parents.
Together, each family set their own boundaries.
It was unanimously accepted the girls would not engage in sex before marriage, but other than that, the mothers and daughters decided what actions were beyond the acceptable standards. In other words, what would be allowed?Holding hands? Dating in a group? Kissing? Being alone with a boy? Touching? .
We never discussed it in class, but I imagined this:
Family #1 decides their line in the sand is: “No sex before marriage.” However, someone points out that wherever the line is drawn, many teenagers will step slightly past it. Whoa. Not good.
So Family #2 decides to draw the line at: “No touching below the neck.” Yet the mothers all agree they don’t want a boy’s grubby hands anywhere near their girls’ young bodies. Better move the line over a bit, just to be safe.
Family #3 has a brilliant idea: “No alone time with a boy.” But darling daughter argues that she’s looked forward to dating for years and besides, the boys she knows are super trustworthy.
Therefore, Family #4 compromises. Dating will be allowed but “No kissing.” Another mother rolls her eyes. That’s asking too much. Every girl has the right to a good night kiss on the front porch, right? But . . . what if they’re not on the front porch?
Family #5 wonders if “No physical contact“ might be appropriate. The teenagers could simply hang out with the family and have fun together. Family #5 decides to keep this idea to themselves though. Everyone would probably laugh.